Chidren's Bible Class, Family Matters

Do Your Hands Bear Fruit?

Joy

As we continue our study of Proverbs 31:10-31, I think it is fitting to remind ourselves of the approach we ought to have when studying any portion of Scripture. When studying God’s Word, it is vital that we approach the Scripture with the intent that we will lay our lives down next to the Word, and since the Word is the absolute standard, we must be willing to change our lives to make them fit the Standard.  However, some folks like to take the Standard, twist it and change it, so that it appears to conform to their life.

Sadly, there has been a lot of twisting when it comes to Proverbs 31:16.  Instead of approaching the Scriptures with an open mind and a willing heart, ready to conform to God’s plan for the family,  The assertion is made, based on this Proverbs 31:16, that the virtuous woman had a career, a business which took her away from her family, in real estate. However hard as one may try, one simply cannot come to that conclusion with honest exegesis.

So, just what can we glean from Proverbs 31:16?
She considers a field and buys it;
with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.

The virtuous woman does indeed play an active part in expanding her family’s resources.  There seem to be a couple of possibilities here.  The Hebrew text literally says that she “taketh” it.  This could possibly mean that she looked over the family property, and upon seeing that a certain field is not presently being used, she takes it and puts it to good use by planting a vineyard.  However, the word is most commonly translated “buy”, and so we will continue with that supposition.

First, she considers the field and buys it. That is – she does not buy impulsively!  Before buying she gives thought to: “Can we afford it?”  “Is it worth it?” ” Is the soil fertile so that it will produce well?” “Will it benefit my family?”  Only after satisfactorily considering if the benefit will outweigh the cost is the purchase made.

Perhaps we would do well to evaluate our own spending habits.  Compulsive shopping is a significant problem in our shop-happy society.  It creates hardship on the family budget and it is not in keeping with being good stewards, which the Lord requires of us.  Too often people engage in emotional shopping, using it as a temporary fix for a troubled spirit. There is a saying that my husband heard growing up, and it bears repeating: “If your outgo exceeds your income, then your upkeep will be your downfall.”

Second, “with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.”  The virtuous woman was able to use her homemaking skills to generate some extra money, and in turn, she used that extra income to build additional resources for the family.  Notice that the text does not say that she set up a business away from her home. The text does indicate that she worked diligently at home, and she enjoyed profit from her endeavors.

Additionally, she didn’t have the attitude “This is MY money which I earned, and so I will spend it on MYSELF.”   Too often women have the attitude that if they are able to generate extra income, for some reason it automatically ought to be their own, to spend on all those extras which they like to enjoy.  The worthy woman of Proverbs 31 always had the well-being of her family in mind, and she did her part to help the family prosper.  Yes, she did personally benefit from the fruit of her labors – she enjoyed fine clothing and tapestry, but she was not selfish with her gain.

From her profit (the fruit of her hands) she was able to secure the vines to plant in the vineyard.  She had the cash first, then she made the purchase.  We would do well to do a self-examination on spending habits. Our society makes plastic purchases so tempting.  We are bombarded daily with advertisements trying to convince us of our latest “need.”  Sometimes people do suffer hard times, due to circumstances beyond their control – illness, loss of job, etc., but very often financial difficulties are a result of poor money handling.  There is a reason why financial gurus, such as Dave Ramsey, have a huge following.

Verse 16 is just another glimpse into her fine character which gave her husband every reason to be able to trust in her.  She demonstrated good industry and wise stewardship, which resulted in blessings for her family.

Chidren's Bible Class, Family Matters, Uncategorized

Are Your Hands Working Willingly?

Joy
Have you ever thought about the long process that is required in order to make your clothes?  For those of us who like to occasionally sew clothing by hand, we might be tempted to think how impressive we are just because we’ve gone to the fabric store, chosen some material and a pattern, cut out pattern pieces, and then sewed a garment together.   Not so for the woman in Proverbs 31.
Proverbs 31:13
She seeks wool and flax,
and works with willing hands.
Wool and flax were “the” materials from which all clothes were made in the Middle East and Egypt, up until the time of the Exile.  Therefore, during the time period in which this woman would have lived, having these items at her disposal was necessary in order to provide clothing and other essential items for her family.
What if you had to raise your own sheep, sheer them, wash the wool, dye it, spin and weave it, and finally you’d have it ready to cut out pieces for your garment, to sew together? And flax – think about this process:  after the plants have reached maturity, they are pulled up by the roots and then dried.  The stems are soaked in water for several weeks so that the outer bark decays, and then the inner fibers are combed, spun into thread, and then woven.  Now the actual piecing together of a garment can be accomplished. 
Even though the Proverbs 31 had maidens to help with household tasks (vs. 15), her hands know what it means to work.  She did not run to the fabric store when she decided to tackle a sewing project.  She didn’t shop online to take advantage of the remarkable sale of the week.  If her family was to be properly clothed, she must plan ahead and work diligently so that in the months to come, she would have the necessary cloth from which to sew their clothing.

Not only did her hands know what it meant to work, but her work was done willingly.  Like all of us, surely there were some tasks that she enjoyed more than others, but still, her work was done not out of compulsion or with complaint, but she willingly did her work because she loved her family.

In spite of all the conveniences we have today,  how many of us, even if we don’t grumble and complain audibly, sometimes display a less than cheerful disposition when the time comes to do those jobs we find dull or distasteful?  Sure, we might love to get in the kitchen and make a delicious meal, but when it comes to other menial tasks, such as mopping the floor, folding and ironing clothes, or scrubbing the toilet, Ms. Grumpy has arrived.  We let it be known, in no uncertain terms, that we hate this or that part of homemaking.  “I hate doing __________, but I hope you know I’m doing this for you because I love you.” Sound familiar? Is that kind of attitude really saying “I’m doing this because I love you?”
Remember the old saying  (I don’t really like this saying) –  “if Mamma’s not happy…” – you know the rest.  Well, the opposite can be true as well.  When Mom is cheerful, it certainly can be contagious for the rest of the family. Remember the Seven Dwarfs who whistled while they worked?

A healthy dose of cheerfulness can go a long way in setting a positive atmosphere in your household.
We have the opportunity to teach our children, by our example, that work is not a miserable requirement that must be taken care of before we can have any fun, but rather, it can be very rewarding to set our hands to the task at hand, regardless of what it is, and feel a sense of accomplishment when we are through.
“Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might…” Ecclesiastes 9:10
Chidren's Bible Class, Family Matters

Are You Good to Your Husband?

Joy
Recently there was an article posted online in which the author presented biblical evidence for the existence of Satan.  As people often do, comments were made concerning the article.  Sadly, one man made this comment: “I know he exists; I’m married to his sister!”  I do not know this person in any way, but that one comment revealed that something is terribly wrong in that marriage.  A man who would say such about his wife definitely needs some work on loving his wife like Christ loves the church, but that would be a whole other lesson.  Aside from this deplorable comment, I wondered what his wife must be like in order to prompt such a comment.
Proverbs 31:12  
She does him good, and not harm,
all the days of her life.
I’ve studied Proverbs 31:10-31 several times, and in my opinion, verse 12 is one of, if not THE most challenging verses of this section.  When things seem perfect it may not seem like such a hard thing to do, but what about the rest of the time?  When we are stressed, tired, suffering from PMS, etc., are we given an exemption from doing good to our husbands, and not harm?  We know what is the right thing to do in theory, but oh, the challenge we have when life is not so perfect. None of us has perfected the art of being the Proverbs 31 woman, and so what I’m about to say definitely includes me.
There are three main areas that wives need to concentrate on doing good to their husbands: 

First, we need to do good to our husbands physically.   We ought to provide healthy balanced meals, make sure he has clean clothes to wear, and make your home a welcome haven of rest for him.  What husband wants to come home to a house that’s a wreck, food that a dog would walk away from, and the need to scrounge through the laundry basket to find something clean to wear.  Have you seen the show 911 Nannies?  Maybe we need 911 Homemaking. 🙂

Second, we need to do good to our husbands emotionally.  A man needs to feel loved, respected, and appreciated.  We ought to study our husbands like a science, so that we can anticipate his needs without a word being spoken, and do all we can to fulfill them. You know that little but powerful member of the body that James talks about – the tongue?  We should use it to build him up, not tear him down.  Express appreciation for his work, and give him sincere compliments.  Don’t air your gripes about him to the world – yes, that includes facebook. If you have an issue, discuss it with him privately, respectfully, and with a submissive attitude.

Third, we need to do good to our husbands in the area of intimacy.  We must be vigilant in maintaining our loyalty to our husbands, both in mind and in body.  We will not flirt with other men, but by all means, flirt with your husband! It means we will dress modestly.  We are not doing good to our husbands if we reveal to others what should be reserved for his eyes only. Do your best to anticipate and fulfill his needs, so that he is not tempted to look elsewhere for fulfillment.
So much more can be said.  Maybe I’ll have to do a Part 2. 🙂
Chidren's Bible Class

Are You Trustworthy?

Joy

Due to being out of town, I wasn’t able to post last week for our Proverbs 31 Bible study, so I’m going to try and make up the one I missed, plus do the one for this week.

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The prevailing message of Prov. 31:10-31 revolves around the excellent household management skills of this virtuous woman. Verses 10-12 give an overview of her general excellent character, and then the remainder of the chapter details particular traits relating to the care of her family and the management of her home.

Proverbs 31:11
The heart of her husband trusts in her,
and he will have no lack of gain. (ESV)

Keeping within the context of this particular passage, how does trust in his wife relate to his having no lack of gain?

Money issues are at the top of the list when it comes to marriage woes. I’ve observed many couples over the years and in many, many instances, the wife bears significant responsibility for financial difficulties. The way that a woman manages the household has great bearing on the financial condition of the family.

Some women are not trustworthy because they are deceptive.

* Do you make big purchases without his knowledge or approval?
* Do you “buy now, pay later”- aka charge, perhaps with an account he doesn’t know about?
* Do you hide purchases from him?

You get the picture. If we are deceptive in our spending practices, how can we expect our husband to trust us?

Additionally, it has been my observation that many women have never learned how to effectively run a household, and as a result, have not learned the fine art of stretching the dollar. Learning wise household management can mean the difference between prospering and financial ruin. Part of the wife’s responsibility is to use money wisely, so that unnecessary financial burden is not placed upon the husband. Sorry ladies, but a cart full of boxed mixes, pre-packaged meals, and disposable this and that is not the wisest use of money.

We need to show our husbands that we appreciate them and the work they put forth to provide for the family by being good stewards and managing our resources wisely.