And the Bride Wore…White?

A short perusal through history will reveal that the white wedding dress is generally a tradition that has become more prominent only in the last 100 years or so. Before Queen Victoria’s wedding in 1840, most brides wore popular colors of the day. At that time, blue was a symbol of purity, and therefore many brides wore blue on their wedding day. Since Queen Victoria wore a lavishly decorated white wedding dress, trends turned at that point. Fancy white wedding dresses were still reserved for the wealthy; ordinary folks certainly could not afford a dress that would only be worn once. After department stores became commonplace, white wedding dresses were much more available and attainable for your average person, and by 1890, the white wedding dress was the acceptable norm. In the early 1900’s, one might have worn a simple white wedding dress, but have it dyed after the wedding, so that the dress could continue to be used.

Although human traditions come and go, white does represent purity in a biblical context.  Revelation 3:5 states that those who overcome are wearing white, and their names will not be blotted out of the book of life. Revelation 7:14 refers to someone whose garments had turned white, because the garments had been washed in the blood of the Lamb. These are just a couple of verses indicating that God chose white to represent individuals who had their sins washed away; those who were spiritually pure.

What about brides today?  White, and sometimes ivory, are still the color of choice for a wedding dress.  While white traditionally symbolizes purity, the reality is that sadly, for many brides the color is meaningless.  How many young women who stand before God in marriage, have already given away  their most precious gift, which should have been saved for her husband, to present to him on their wedding day? How many young women stand before God on their wedding day, with a child already growing their womb?  In other words, how many young women are outwardly adorned in white, but their spiritual garments are stained by sin?

There was a time when becoming pregnant prior to marriage was shameful.  In fact, many times the pregnant young woman was sent away in an attempt to avoid shame and embarrassment for the family. Unfortunately, often there was more concern about how people might view the reputation of the family as a whole, rather than being concerned with and addressing  the spiritual needs of the young couple. 

In this day and age, we’ve had a huge shift in thinking, including in the church. Let me be clear: forgiveness certainly needs to be extended towards those who demonstrate repentance. Young people need to be encouraged and supported as they deal with the consequences of their sin.  The child brought into the world is completely innocent and in no way should that child be held responsible or punished because of the sin of his or her parents.

However, it is not appropriate to minimize the seriousness of the sin and turn it into a celebratory event, complete with baby showers and a constant stream of  “Congratulations..I’m SO happy for you!”  On one occasion, a mother who had recently had her third child related to me how much fun it was to go through pregnancy together with a young unwed mother in the congregation.  On another occasion, I witnessed a quick walk to the front pew to make the obligatory confession, and then by the next service, the unwed mother was proudly rubbing her belly.  On yet another occasion, I was aware of a young woman who became pregnant, and in no uncertain terms let her friends know that she and her boyfriend were happy about it, and furthermore, she did not want any negative feedback. She professed to be a Christian. Somewhere along the way something has become very skewed. 

Both men and women, young and old, will be held accountable for their own choices.  To those who are older and ought to be wiser, what are WE doing to help our young people adhere to biblical standards?  Are we helping them or hindering them? Are we setting an example of purity? Are we teaching them? Do we hold them accountable for their sins or do we reward them? 

When it comes down to it, the actual color of your dress on your wedding day is rather inconsequential.  Colors have meant different things throughout the ages, and to this day they still symbolize different things in different cultures.  What really matters? The color of your spiritual garment. Your purity. Determine that no matter what, you will save your gift and give it only to your husband, after you are married. However, if you have given away your gift but you are not yet married, do not despair.  Through genuine repentance, your tainted garment can be restored to white once again.